Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes

Dahlings, I have a question: With her sophisticated new look, her husband’s support and returned-to-calm demeanor and a beautiful baby girl, why does the Snarkstress Style Icon Leader, Katie Holmes, never seem to be smiling anymore? Why?

I’ll tell you why: she’s been hanging out with the likes of Victoria Beckham, aka Posh Frowny-Face, too much lately. Seriously. Doesn’t it seem a bit like a coinky-dink that Katie’s hair is suddenly a sleek bob? That she’s lost a gazillion pounds (she still looks good, but is definitely on the verge of over-doing it right quick here)? That she seems to always angle her face in “that way” narrowing her eyes a bit to look mysterious and coy? Me thinks the Beckhams and Cruises have had one too many dinner parties where Posh is conducting “Look Like an Indifferent Bitch 101” seminars and Katie’s her top pupil.

Now really, it’s no secret I think Katie is amazing. Her marathon-running, jet-setting mommy ass is completely inspirational. Her clothes and style truly are exceptional. But her smile is missing and that, it seems, is a missing part of her character. Just because you’re all grown up, doesn’t mean you can’t crack a smile, love. Learn it, live it. Tell Posh to take a hike!

Just my two cents, dahlings. Happy Hump Day. *mwah*