Lauren Conrad, the human equivalent of melted vanilla ice cream, was supposed to get a new MTV reality show that followed her as she launched her new fashion collection. It would have been her third collaboration with the network after Laguna Beach and The Hills. However, after she filmed a pilot, MTV passed on the show. Conrad’s team is already in PR rescue mode, releasing this statement to Us Weekly:

We sold a show to MTV, filmed it and are really proud of the final result. MTV felt the subject matter was too high brow for their audience and offered me the opportunity to change the show by incorporating more of my personal life. We agreed going into the project that this show would be an aspirational one, focusing on my career and my goals and not my personal relationships. We delivered the show that we sold and are sorry MTV didn’t feel their viewers were savvy enough to appreciate it.

Let me translate that for you, in case you don’t speak publicist.

Despite being utterly talentless and not terribly interesting, Lauren Conrad filmed a reality pilot for MTV. MTV hated it and needed some kind of excuse for not picking the show up, so they tried to make Lauren feel better by telling her that the show was “too highbrow.” But that’s sort of like when a guy dumps you by telling you that you’re too good for him. It turns out that watching Lauren draw pictures of tank tops and pretend to be a fashion designer was even more boring than watching her go to lunch with Lo and sit there blinking for 20 minutes.

No word on whether the fashion line will still happen or if its funding was entirely contingent on the show. In the meantime, Lauren plans to pick the pieces of her life up again by having someone ghostwrite another style book for her.