Remember that exceptionally dramatic scene in Liz & Dick where Lindsay Lohan, playing Elizabeth Taylor, declares that she can’t live without Richard Burton and runs down a hallway to gobble down a fistful of pills? You ain’t seen nothing until you’ve seen her in The Canyons.

Full disclosure, I have no idea whatsoever what is happening in this scene from The Canyons with her and James Deen, other than that cannot be her phone:


But I can pick up on some essential messages.

The phone is not Lindsay Lohan’s phone

Lindsay Lohan is good at shaking and crying

Phones are really important to people. Seriously. Really important.

Linday Lohan’s career is utterly insane, but she does seem to be playing situations that are true to her own life, which, from what I gather from every tabloid, involves a lot of shaking and crying.

Everything Lindsay Lohan does reminds me of how menacing and unpredictable the world could be, if I lived in an entirely different one than the one I do.

I am somewhat surprised that more sexy stuff did not happen with James Deen. I guess there will probably be more sexy stuff in the movie later. That seems reasonable.

Picture via The Canyons