If you are watching the Bowl today, I hope you very much enjoy it and that you have all the right kind of snacks. If you are not, I hope you find something equally pleasant with which to pass the time. I’m not anti-Bowls, you know? Let everyone enjoy whatever bowls they like, I’ve always said, having a very tolerant bowl enjoyment policy. I’m broad-minded.

That said, this kind of Event – the bring over your friends and gather round a cracklin’ television kind of Event – brings up a serious question that demands attention from Serious People. Is talking allowed during communal TV-watching? (Movies, Important Television Episodes, and sports all fall under the same category here.) You cannot abstain from deciding in this matter. You must act. There are the Shushers:

Don’t act like you don’t know the contract. There are rules. You don’t get mad at kids making kid-noises in the middle of The Princess And The Frog, but you do in the middle of Inglourious Basterds. Everybody’s got expectations, and in some movies, in some theaters, in some moments, you’re not going to bother anybody by pulling focus from the movie, because you’re at a crowd-participation movie.

But you must, must, must know your moments, and if you don’t, then you can’t go to the movies.

And there are Talkers:

What about Mystery Science Theater 3000? People who don’t have any witty friends to talk over their movie will actually pay to have fake friends talk over their movie!

DVD’s have commentary tracks as extras.

Talking about / at movies with friends and strangers is great!

P.S. I don’t talk in public movie theaters or in other people’s homes unless invited to do so.

Only one of these can hold the moral high ground, the other must be cast into outer darkness where there is weeping and gnashing of teeth. Please choose your side and duke it out in the comments.

[Image via Wikimedia Commons]