You know, I live in L.A., so I constantly hear about people doing cleanse this and colonics that. Personally, I think it’s really stupid, and I judge people a little bit when I hear about them doing it. I just feel like, in what way do you think that starving yourself for a few days is good for your body? What kinds of books are you reading? What kind of bullshit are you falling for?

Believe me — as a recovered anorexic, I have a fair amount of history in learning about how no matter how “good” it feels, starving yourself is bad for you. When you add in beverages with no nutritional value but a lot of acidity and irritants, and laxatives (yes, I’m looking at you, The Master Cleanse), what you have is a toxic mix that is likely ripping your insides apart (and probably causing heartburn!).

Also, here’s what a cleanse won’t do: give you control over your life. Much like an eating disorder, it may give you a very false sense of control, and also much like an eating disorder, it will be very unhealthy, both physically and psychologically. You will not gain control over your problems. In fact, all you’ll gain is a few days of avoidance, thereby making your problems even more anxiety-provoking when you return to them.

But all that said, a lot of people disagree with me and think that cleanses are real things that people do to make them more healthy. What do you think?

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