So the day before yesterday was the first warm day of the year in New York City. It was in the 70s! Many women (self included) celebrated by putting on their beloved summer clothes that had been sitting in the back of their closets all winter and reveling in the feeling of sun finally touching their pale, light-deprived bodies. Meanwhile, many men celebrated by flexing their ability to make random women on the street uncomfortable by yelling unsolicited comments about their looks.

Including this “reporter” for a website called “Guyism” which promises to contain “what guys need.” But he did it with a camera and microphone, so maybe it was cute? (No.) In the video, titled “Thanking the Women Who Showed Skin on the First Day of Spring,” one intrepid manscaped metrosexual goes around thanking random women on the street and in the park for “showing some skin” and offering them prizes, like candy and leis, which some of them are loathe to accept for fear of encouraging him. “We haven’t seen skin on the street in months and months!” he tells one woman who was just trying to enjoy the weather without being molested by the male gaze. Poor baby.

In the end, I realize the video was supposed to be silly, and it was, but it lacked the irony or distance on its subject necessary to actually be funny. As someone who was catcalled and made to feel gross at least three times within my first hour of wearing shorts this year, I’m sorry if I don’t find men’s exercise of power over women charming.

Here’s a tip for you, men: if you really want women to keep on “showing skin,” you will leave us the fuck alone when we do so. Because every time a guy treats my body like public property, it makes me want to buy a fucking burkha and be done with it. I’ve already sworn off cleavage forever because I hate the amount of harassment I get; don’t make me put my arms, legs and face away, too. I realize that everyone has eyes, and everyone is capable of recognizing which members of the gender they’re attracted to they find, well, attractive. Believe it or not, I, myself, often notice when men are attractive. But I don’t make it their problem, because that would be rude, and because that’s a really disrespectful way to talk to a stranger. If you want to actually have sex with a sexy stranger, chat them up about something. But if you want to hand them a problem to deal with (you), by all means, keep yelling things about their body.

Happy spring!

(Via Gothamist)