A Republican candidate for the House of Representatives, Hans Zieger, has spoken out against the Girl Scouts of America, claiming they turn girls into feminist, pro-abortion lesbians. This inspired me to do an office survey (it’s an all-female workplace) and see if Zieger had a point or not. Below, a sampling of our staff.

LILIT MARCUS, Editor, TheGloss

YEARS AS A GIRL SCOUT: About five. Brownies, then Juniors.

LESBIAN? Nope.

FEMINIST? You betcha.

PRO-ABORTION? Choice is fun!

HANNAH SIEGEL, Editorial intern, TheGloss

YEARS AS A GIRL SCOUT: About three, Brownies.

LESBIAN? No.

FEMINIST? Yes.

PRO-ABORTION? Yes.

DREW GRANT, Deputy Editor, Crushable

YEARS AS A GIRL SCOUT: Five. Brownie, then Junior.

LESBIAN? No, but I dabbled in college.

FEMINIST? Yeah, sure.

PRO-ABORTION? Oh, definitely.

LIANA MAEBY, Contributing Writer, Crushable

YEARS AS A GIRL SCOUT: Three

LESBIAN? No.

FEMINIST: Sure.

PRO-ABORTION: Um, you mean pro-choice, right?

CARRIE SLOAN, Associate Editor, Blisstree

YEARS AS A GIRL SCOUT: Three

LESBIAN? No.

FEMINIST? Yeah.

PRO-ABORTION? Yeah…