The Abominable Snowman may be an ape-like cryptid of legend, but you can become an Abominable Snow-diva with the right clothes and accessories. These totally impractical and somewhat hideous versions of winter-wear will make you look like a snow-sasquatch who loves to look sexy as you scare everyone from Nepal to your favorite hometown dive-bar.
Wheeler Springs Sweater- White like a snowman, cozy enough and complete with flappy drapey bits reminiscent of the abominable snowman’s labia.
Love From Australia Zip Tall Wedge Boots- Uggs are infamous for not being cute, so why not try to sex them up with a wedge? Oh, because that’s abominable.
Teddy Fur Pea Coat- I actually think this one is cute, but once it’s covered in blood and mud from your snowman attacks, it will look abominable. The teddy bear fur looks a lot like real yeti-fur, but no yetis were harmed in the making of this coat.
Cable Mohair Pants- These sure look cozy which is what you need when you’re out in the cold menacing villagers. Paired wiht the rest of the items on this list, they’ll look positively terrifying. The etsy seller calls them “fetish” pants, so they’ll surely arouse some yeti-fetishists.
Go forth, be the best dressed abominable snow-bitch at that nightclub.