Having lived abroad for the past five years, I’ve been hearing a lot about how I need to start watching soccer—sorry, “football”—like everybody else. But it took the cover of Vogue Spain to make me pay attention, because they just put famous soccer player Cristiano Ronaldo on the cover, and he’s completely naked and way, way hot.

I knew all the international Vogues had something US Vogue did not, I just did not know that missing je ne sais quoi was naked dudes.

Ronaldo was photographed with model and real-life girlfriend Irina Shayk by Mario Testino for the June issue of Vogue Spain. In it, Ronaldo is completely naked except for some hair gel and an earring. Shayk wears a fashion-forward modern wedding dress that makes her boobs look great. (In that way, this cover is very similar to Kim Kardashian and Kanye West’s Vogue cover. Except, y’know, we couldn’t see Kanye’s pubes.)

What would it take to convince Anna Wintour to loosen up her Prada shift dress and put more naked men on the cover of Vogue?

Inside the magazine, things just get even hotter. If you have ever wondered what it would be like to be inconceivably rich, world-famous, and really, really, ridiculously good looking, it would evidently be a lot like this:

 Just a normal couple hanging out on the couch and being unspeakably gorgeous, no big deal.

(Photos: Vogue Spain)