Sunday night’s Academy Awards were about more than beautiful dresses and honoring the best contributions to film in 2013; they were about you.

Oscars dresses are a Rorschach test for your soul. What you see in one tells you everything there is to know about your past, present, and future. (On a good day, we can give some pretty good investment tips for your next reincarnation.) Here is what your favorite 2014 Oscars dress says about you.

(Photos: Getty)