Halle Berry wins worst dressed at the golden globe awards 2013

Last night, we reacted to the Golden Globes red carpet. This morning, we picked up the pieces.

Predictably, there wasn’t much to like on the red carpet and there was even less to remember. Luckily, the fashion disasters came fast and furious: Halle Berry showed her midriff, Alyssa Milano went to prom, and Jennifer Lopez really wanted you to think about her naked.

Let’s have a look at our picks for the top ten worst dressed of the night:

Alyssa Milano golden globesAlyssa Milano‘s tangerine Ports 1961 gown seemed to be the target of unanimous derision.

Rosario Dawson golden globes red carpetRosario Dawson wins for worst peplum in Antonio Berardi. Although we think she looks great in this delicate robin’s egg shade, the dress shortens her dramatically and doesn’t flatter anywhere.

Nicole Kidman golden globes dressesNicole Kidman in Alexander McQueen. This constricting gown made little sense, but it sure was severe!

Jennifer Lopez golden globe awards red carpet fashionJennifer Lopez in Zuhair Murad. Jennifer, please stop. Please go home and put on a real dress. This is fucking ridiculous.

70th Annual Golden Globe Awards - ArrivalsRosie Huntington-Whiteley wore Hedi Slimane‘s first go-round for the rebranded Saint Laurent. The supermodel made little sense in a cravat over a leather cumberbund.

Lea Michele golden globe awardsLea Michele in Elie Saab. It wouldn’t be an awards show without some swath of Lea Michele. Girl, just once do something interesting.

Halle Berry worst dressed golden globe awardsHalle Berry in Atelier Versace. Worst dressed of the whole evening, right?

Thandie Newton golden globe awardsThandie Newton in Giles. Newton’s mini was weird, stiff, and unflattering (was it growing on her?) while the powder pink heels made it seem more appropriate for, say, the Grammys. She looked lovely from the neck up, though, like always.

Heidi Klum golden globe awards Heidi Klum in Alexandre Vauthier. Klum laid on the cheese in piles of blonde sideswept waves, gold accents, a skintight white dress (with a slit so high it seemed to make her uncomfortable) and still more gold on her feet.

Giuliana Rancic golden globes red carpet Giuliana Rancic in Celia Kritharioti was awkward and costume-y.

Okay, ladies! Now’s the fun part…

Please vote for your bottom three looks of the evening:

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(All photos via Getty)