We just got a press release tipping us off to the super-fashionable fashions that you can watch on Gossip Girl tonight. What are they!? What are they!? Apparently:

The girls of the Upper East Side return tonight to the CW’s “Gossip Girl.” Serena braves the New York City winter looking chic in her Donna Karan tights! Tune in tonight to see Serena van der Woodsen  wearing the Donna Karan Sandalfoot Ultra Sheer Control Top tights.

They are control top tights. Just like your grandmother wears. This actually makes us feel like we’re more like them. We’re going to go put on some headbands and make fun of the poors now. And I’m going to do it with my muffin top held in really nicely.