Someone who really loves Mario!

Just kidding. No one wore these to the Oscars. Of course they didn’t. Do they look like they’ve been designed by Christian Louboutin? No. They’re avaialble on Etsy (you can see more like them on Buzzfeed). But since we are all Oscar coverage all the time today, I had to find a way to lure you in somehow. I just like the way these have little Mario inspired toadstools on them. Hah! Hah! But no one wore them to the Academy Awards. Do you know why?

Because no one at the Academy Awards was that cool.

(Except for Emma Stone or possibly Meryl Streep, who will doubtless be sporting these next year.)