Heidi Klum

Objectively speaking, nobody on the entire planet takes Halloween as seriously as one Heidi Klum, whose yearly Halloween party and costume choices make her pretty legendary. Whoever said not caring about Halloween is cool (me, other cool people) obviously never got a look at Klum unfailing commitment to the holiday.

Klum’s costumes first starting getting noticed in 2001, with an admirable Lady Godiva costume. She cycled through Betty Boop and some sort of weird golden number, but I think she really hit her stride in terms of over-the top-unrealness in 2004, with the following costume that defies description:

Heidi Klum's Annual Halloween Party
Remember on Lizzie McGuire when Miranda would be like “oh hey, instead of settling on a hair style, I just did everything at once?” This might be the Miranda of Halloween costumes.
Here’s an Interpretive Vampire for 2005.
Heidi Klum's Annual Halloween PartyPunk.
In 2006, Klum portrayed the apple from the Garden of Eden.
Heidi Klum and Lena Gercke
I love a biblical costume.
In 2007, Klum dressed up as a pretty cute cat.
heidi klum halloween 2007This hits a great mix of sexy and adorable.
It’s 2008 and I don’t even know.
Heidi Klum
Wait, how is this okay? Shouldn’t somebody…call someone?
Here’s 2009’s sexy raven.
Heidi Klum
I think this is a disco alien in 2010.
Heidi Klum's 11th Annual Halloween Party
I don’t understand the mechanics of her legs in this situation.
In 2011, she dressed up as a monkey.
Heidi KlumWhy are the nipples so defined? Sorry, that was monkey shaming. Bonus: Klum wore this human innards number to a different party in 2011.
Heidi Klum
Because of Hurricane Sandy, Klum cancelled her 2012 party, so we’re short a costume. I wonder what she’ll be this year! Smart money’s on those astronauts from Gravity and she’ll somehow rig a costume that in fact defies gravity.
Photos: Getty Images, WENN