The forever-bronzed Valentino with Ms. Goop Paltrow.

If you had over $7 million just laying around, what would you do with it? I’d like to think charity would be top on the list, followed by wise investment then something materialistic and stereotypical like shoes. Or, if you wanted to be really fancy, you could purchase a fashion house. I think I’d go for Chanel and boot Karl out of there just for my own entertainment, then justify it with “well, I’m now rich and not just a normal asshole, but a super asshole, and this is how shit is going to go down from now on.” Anything to make Karl sad the way he tends to make others sad, is my philosophy. Maybe he could get a job at Coach!

According to WWD Valentino is about to be scooped up by an unnamed “single party,” while London Telegraph is claiming everything is finalized, but then we have Sky News saying that they know the buyers and it’s the royal family of Qatar who also own London’s world-renowned Harrod’s. Apparently, the family wanted Valentino so they can add it to their “trophy” collection of major big money assets. Of course, each news outlet is declaring exclusivity on the knowledge, but in the end it’s not going to matter much. What will matter is once the iconic brand is in the hands of whomever this mystery buyer is, how will it be affected in the long run.


Photo: Stella Pictures