If you are for some reason still laboring under the delusion that New York Fashion Week is anything other than a primitive, Hobbesian nightmare wherein underfed people compete physically and mentally with one another for alpha dog status, here is a story for you.
Jalouse Magazine editor Jennifer Eymere reportedly slapped a PR person named Lynn Tesoro after getting into a kerfuffle about seating at the Zac Posen runway show last night. According to WWD, the fire marshal forced them to remove 60 seats at the last minute, causing Eyemere (along with her sister and mother) to be denied their seats. Shade was thrown, gum was snapped, and eventually Eyemere laid the smack down on Tesoro in what sounds like the haughtiest and French-est way possible. I’m going to assume she removed her gloves first and said “You have offended me, Madame!”
When reached for comment on the incident, Eyemere expressed little remorse, instead doubling down on the righteousness of her violent retribution:
She claimed Tesoro was being inappropriate to her mother, saying that she first had to seat other people. “I said, ‘Don’t speak to my mom like this. You have to stop to speak like that.’ I said, ‘Be careful, I am going to slap you,’ and she kept doing it, and it just happened.
“I am sorry, I know it’s bad to do that,” she added. “It was a small slap. It was not strong. I didn’t hurt her, it was just to humiliate her. She humiliated my mom, and I humiliated her in front of her crew. Voilà. I just said at the end, ‘Now you know you don’t f–k with French people.’”
I’m not saying I support violence as a solution to your fashion week problems, but if you are going to slap someone, you might as well finish off with a “voilà,” non? And just in case you were wondering if the fashion world actually condones such behavior, Posen reportedly apologized to Eyemere (i.e. the grown woman who slapped another person) for the incident. So there you have it. NYFW is officially Lord Of The Flies, but with fewer carbs and better haircuts.