Yesterday, I criticized the cast of Hitchcock for wearing terrible outfits to the movie’s New York premiere. I think they must have been reading, because not only did they step up their outfit game for the LA Premiere, but distinguished thespian Helen Mirren treated the world to a little bit of hot girl-on-girl action when she got all up in Jessica Biel‘s shit. Naughty Helen Mirren!

Here we see her greeting Biel palm outstretched, to signify her intentions.

Here we see her starting to go for it.

Here we see her really going for it. We don’t have access to that picture, but feel free to click the link for some super steamy Mirren-on-Biel realness. (As well as a better look at Biel’s sideboob.)

And lest Biel’s bottom get lonely, here Mirren gives that a friendly tap, as well.

Helen and Toni Collette find this all hilarious, while Biel looks slightly embarrassed, but also turned on.

And don’t worry, the feeling is mutual:

Congratulations, Helen Mirren. You have singlehandedly redeemed the Hitchcock red carpet photos. You’ve also given me one of the stranger lady-boners I’ve experienced in my life.

Photos: WENN, @JessicaBiel