kendall-kylie-jenner-mmvma-awardsI do not know what is happening up there in Canada, but Kylie Jenner just showed up at the MuchMusic Video Awards wearing an ice skating costume, while her sister wore a potential wardrobe malfunction covered in decorative door knockers.

Kendall Jenner’s ivory crepe Fausto Puglisi gown has severe, almost medieval silhouette with long sleeves and a heavily embellished center panel, but this dress is genuinely all about the slits. There are two of them, and they go all the way up to her navel.


The shape of the center fabric panel makes it buckle at the bottom in an unattractive way, but mostly this dress causes concern because of the overwhelming possibility of that flap moving the wrong way and exposing young Jenner’s entire vagina, a la Paris Hilton. If that fabric is not taped to her abdomen with six feet of wig tape, I do not know how she possibly avoided a wardrobe malfunction last night.

It might be too early in the morning for me to make coherent judgments, because I find myself weirdly attracted to Kylie’s over-the-top orange mini dress. It’s a sheer illusion dress, which I generally hate, and it looks like an ice skating costume, but something about it is working for me. It has sort of a sparkly, sexy power vibe that reminds me of Joan Collins in the 1980s, and for some reason that’s working for me. It also explains her recent hair change. The blue hair she was wearing until this weekend would have clashed with the carnelian-colored dress she’s wearing. The all-over black hair goes much better.

(Photos: Wenn, Giphy)