Kim Kardashian Maternity Style

As everyone in the world, even the ones without television and Twitter, already know, Baby Yeezus Kimye, AKA Child Of All Children, AKA Neo, AKA “The One,” has been born. Finally, the media can stop calling Kim Kardashian fat! Well, let’s be honest, they probably won’t stop doing that (but, if you’re listening, General Tabloid Media People: seriously, it’d be cool if you stopped doing that).

Now, despite having given Kim an e-hard time with her wardrobe choices and never-ending cutouts, we are admittedly fascinated with these daily decisions she dons (I realize how hokey that alliteration sounded now that I’ve typed it, but it feels so appropriate here). Therefore, we are delivering you a review of all the oddities Kim Kardashian has worn while pregnant. And you know what I learned while making this little list? Some of her outfits were actually pretty nice! And that the ones that were bad were really, really bad. I learned that, too.

kim kardashian lace cutouts


Her New Year’s outfit was the first sign that the maternity wear train was gonna be a long and bumpy ride.

CALGARY, CANADA - JANUARY 04: Kim Kardashian hosts ICED at Cowboys Dance Hall January 4, 2013 in Calgary, Canada. (Photo by Mike Ridewood/Getty Images)

F’ing. Cutouts.

Kim Kardashian icicle cutout


LOS ANGELES, CA - FEBRUARY 13: Kim Kardashian arrives at the Topshop Topman LA Opening Party at Cecconi's West Hollywood on February 13, 2013 in Los Angeles, California.

Remember this one? I know, I know, you were trying to forget it…:(

BEVERLY HILLS, CALIFORNIA - Thursday February 21, 2013. Kim Kardashian shows off her growing baby bump as she arrives at The Peninsula hotel in Beverly Hills.

Hey, this dress was actually pretty nice!

Kim Kardashian wearing peplum pants.


…by wearing these. My single least favorite pair of pants on the entire planet.

WEST HOLLYWOOD, CA - FEBRUARY 24: TV personality Kim Kardashian attends the 21st Annual Elton John AIDS Foundation Academy Awards Viewing Party at West Hollywood Park on February 24, 2013.

I know a lot of people hated this outfit, but I really loved it. If I were pregnant and hanging out on the red carpet, I think I might gander at a look like this.

BEVERLY HILLS, CA - MARCH 02: Television Personality Kim Kardashian attends DuJour magazine's Spring issue collaboration with Kim Kardashian and Bruce Weber at the Four Seasons Hotel Los Angeles.

This reminds me of a napkin I once used, except devoid of barbeque sauce.

PARIS, FRANCE - MARCH 03: Kim Kardashian and Kanye West attend Givenchy Fall/Winter 2013 Ready-to-Wear show as part of Paris Fashion Week on March 3, 2013 in Paris, France.

When seeing Givenchy‘s Fall/Winter show with Kanye, she wore an invisibility suit!

NEW YORK, NY - MARCH 27: (EXCLUSIVE COVERAGE) Kim Kardashian attends the DuJour Magazine Spring 2013 Issue Celebration at The Darby on March 27, 2013 in New York City.

I’m not sure if I hate this or love it or want to use something like it for storing craft supplies in a clever way.

LOS ANGELES, CA - APRIL 12: Kim Kardashian surrounded by several Los Angeles County Sheriff Deputies leaves the Stanley Mosk Courthouse after attending her divorce hearing with Kris Humphries.

Everybody knows pantsuits with dress tops with collars are the way to go when it comes to divorce proceedings!

LAS VEGAS, NV - APRIL 13: Television personality Kim Kardashian arrives at the Kardashian Khaos store at The Mirage Hotel & Casino for a fan meet-and-greet to support her perfume, Glam

Look, she framed Baby Yeezus for us! Okay, but in all seriousness, I kinda love this look that she wore to the Kardashian Khaos store’s opening at The Mirage Hotel & Casino.

CULVER CITY, CA - APRIL 14: TV personality Kim Kardashian arrives at the 2013 MTV Movie Awards at Sony Pictures Studios on April 14, 2013 in Culver City, California.

I would wear this while pregnant. This could be an insult or compliment, depending on how much you trust my fashion judgment.

Kim Kardashian Lace Cutout

I’m skeptical of cutouts already, but ones like this make me wish they could simply be banned (along with peplums, naturally).

NEW YORK, NY - APRIL 22: Television personality Kim Kardashian attends the E! 2013 Upfront at The Grand Ballroom at Manhattan Center on April 22, 2013 in New York City.

I feel like Snooki is incredibly jealous she didn’t wear this first.

NEW YORK, NY - MAY 06: Kim Kardashian and Kanye West attend the 2013 Costume Institute Gala - PUNK: Chaos to Couture at Metropolitan Museum of Art on May 6, 2013 in New York City.

Aaaand who could forget the epic Met Gala dress? Side note: I liked this a lot better before I realized there was a leg slit and weird snap-like things up on its hem.

Which look are you most fond of?

Photos: Getty Images unless otherwise stated.