Ever since Lady Gaga surfaced wearing a dress composed of raw meat—Grade A, that classifies as F-worthy—my expectations are quite paltry that she will be an iconic fashion goddess. Her latest emergence in Tokyo, though less radical than the beef debacle, and more PETA friendly, is nonetheless equally awful. While Miley Cyrus undeniably wins for worst outfit (costume?) of the year in her nude colored teddy-bear themed leotard that scarred us all, some of Lady Gaga’s outfits cannot be overlooked for a second place ranking. Remember the white, square, face-thing she wore at the VMAs? Uh hum yeah, terrifying.
And so, world, meet Gaga’s newest style: princess pants or Disney denim, whichever you prefer. “Disney” is a word I never expected to incorporate in a description of jeans, so touché, Lady Ga, you got me.
Yes, these are undoubtedly tame in comparison to hovercraft dresses and gigantic seashell umbrellas, but the creepy factor alone officially certifies this article of clothing as disturbing.
Admittedly, I am a huge fan of Disney and I must confess, my wardrobe and accessories once consisted of the princesses, too. In elementary school, I sported a rain coat with Belle’s face, a Pocahontas Barbie doll and Jasmine pajama’s, but, I have since progressed from my childhood icons to other obsessions, like Ryan Gosling, red lipstick, whipped cream flavored vodka, and denim without faces.
So, after some extensive analysis of the jeans and a few moments pondering: “what was she thinking?” let’s review the close details. First of all, Lady G has folded over the waist band, hello mom jeans circa 1992! Invest in a belt? This fashion hype died around the same time as the jacket-tied-around-the-waist look, when we all realized it was embarrassing and ugly. Plus, the faces of our favorite characters have been elongated, creating an evil, slightly androgynous, alter ego of the Disney beauts. My condolences to Cinderella, she definitely got the worst angle for her mug shot, albeit Ariel is looking a little rough, too. Conclusion? I hate these jeans!
Although I do commend Gaga for her ability to walk in those stiletto boots (that I would assume to be a liability), I can’t be the only one who thinks it’s time for her to return this trend to the 90s, or at the very least, back to her closet until Halloween when she can dress up as Kelly Kapowski.