The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Okay everyone, it’s happening. The People’s Choice Awards are airing this very evening, and we’ll be bringing you pictures straight from the red carpet in real time.

As it happens, I don’t really like awards shows all that much. They end up being pretty boring and formulaic, and our only respite is when something goes horribly wrong. I do, however, love red carpets. Simply put, red carpets just have it all–elegant gowns, uncomfortable banter, crisp suits, and the occasional formal cowboy hat, if we’re really lucky.

We’ll be updating frequently throughout the night, so grab yourself a glass of wine and keep checking back for more red carpet looks and our immediate reactions. It’s going to be a great night.

And the first arrivals are here!

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals

Just say no to one shoulder, long-sleeved dresses, Lucy Hale.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals I see your pointed toed, neon shoes, Rocsi Diaz. No.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - ArrivalsRoss Matthews looks dapper even if his jacket is too wide for him.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals

I would have been 100% on board with Melissa Joan Hart‘s printed carpet if it were all one length. I love you, MJH.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Keltie Knight showed up in formal polka dots! Okay!

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - ArrivalsReign‘s Adelaide Kane is somehow selling me on this, despite the illusion cut outs.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals

Ming-Na Wen wore a lovely foreskin.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals

Greer Grammer brings her A-game. I really wish they had sold that dress at Windsor so I could have worn it to my crush’s Bar Mitzvah.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - ArrivalsHere’s cohosts Kat Dennings and Beth Behrs. I’ll reserve judgement until I can see them alone, but I already love Dennings’ little crown thing.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals

Here’s Dennings all alone–she’s so shockingly beautiful that it almost compensates for the fact that the dress is just a little too much…roses?

Next up: sequins, Jessica Alba, Heidi Klum, and an awesome witch.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - ArrivalsNo, Cheryl Burke. I mean this isn’t the Oscars, but how loosey-goosey are we supposed to get?

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals

I like Jillian Rose Reed‘s froofy dress, but I do not care for those shoes.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Okay, I’m starting to get embarrassed about how many of these people I’ve had to google to figure out who the hell they are. Sadie Calvano is one of those people.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - ArrivalsOlga Fonda is wearing an approximation of a dress.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Okay Molly Tarlov, you big weirdo. I think she looks amazing–like a sexy witch who just wants to read poetry with you.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals

Heidi Klum really went for it: severe hair, pointy, embellished shoes, sequin clusters, giant earrings, and an insouciant shoulder flourish. You do you, Klum.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals

Tell me I’m not looking at a bandage dress that zips all the way up. Hello, Jessica Alba?

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Malin Akerman! Who did this to you? GIVE US A NAME!

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Nina Dobrev does sequins and stripper heels right.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Bailee Madison gets a nomination for best dressed.

Next up: a vampy sexy Queen Latifah, a white beaded pant suit, and Chris Pratt making my heart flutter.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals

Sara Bareilles does the Wednesday Addams thing…wait. Are those lips on shoes? Okay, best shoes of the night, hands down.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

I don’t know. Sure, it’s a beaded, white, matching, pant-and-shirt set that my grandma would wear to formal Bingo, I actually kind of love this on Anna Faris.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet And here she is with her husband Chris Pratt, who I want to do sex stuff to.

WAIT! Look at this freaking picture of them together:

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals

Somebody slap me I’m unable to deal with this.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Queen Latifah, you beauty sexy vampire sex machine.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

No but seriously, are these awful neon pointy heels a thing that’s going to be around for a while? I love Sandra Bullock‘s hair and make up but the dress seems more appropriate for Million Moms luncheon.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Allison Williams. Blah.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Allison Janney could wear a swim suit and I’d be like “why didn’t everyone else wear swim suits?”

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Naya Rivera just might be pulling this mullet dress off.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals

Melissa Rauch announces her partnership with Pepto-Bismol.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Jennifer Hudson looks great in all white as always, but what the hell is happening with her shoes?

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals Well, I don’t like that dress one bit. But those are some lovely shoes on Emily Deschanel.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Arrivals

Oh, come on, Sarah Michelle Gellar.

The 40th Annual People's Choice Awards - Red Carpet

Ian Somerhalder‘s suit is great, but I wanna smack that pervy smile right off his face.

That about wraps things up over here! I wish the best of luck to my poor colleague who will have to put together a best dressed list tomorrow morning.

Photos: Getty Images