Because today is the day that those fashionable on the internet hyperventilate over Lanvin for H&M (whether or not it’s a good idea!), today is the day I’m thinking about real Lanvin pieces and just how cruelly far off they will be from what’s piled on the rack at H&M amid the violent fangirls.

Finding something on the internet that was 1) Lanvin, 2) amazing/aspirational and 3) something specifically impossible to be replicated at a big box retailer was a bit of a challenge (most people who buy Lanvin don’t buy it on the internet? WHA?) but I found a fine example.

First off: look at this fuck-off blue. This blue embarrasses other blues and makes them ashamed of their paltry saturation. This blue is electric and startling and gorgeous. This blue set off by that black is so French it makes me ache.

Second, look at each delicate, soft, feminine ruffle. Each tier flutters, every curve is deliberate. H&M would try to replicate this by getting one of those crinkly “pre-wrinkled” fabrics that always end up looking messy no matter what.

Last, look at the generous draping in the sleeves. There’s enough fabric there for your average H&M skirt.

The whole affair is so louche, chic, French… and more importantly, guaranteed to be nothing like what’s on offer at your local H&M. Sigh.

Lanvin Short Dress, $690, Yoox