doctos coat new york times

So, The New York Times recently published a study conducted at Northwestern about how wearing a doctor’s jacket makes you pay significantly more attention to details, and generally be “smarter.”

Which is fascinating! The Times states:

If you wear a white coat that you believe belongs to a doctor, your ability to pay attention increases sharply. But if you wear the same white coat believing it belongs to a painter, you will show no such improvement…

It is not enough to see a doctor’s coat hanging in your doorway, said Adam D. Galinsky, a professor at the Kellogg School of Management at Northwestern University, who led the study. The effect occurs only if you actually wear the coat and know its symbolic meaning — that physicians tend to be careful, rigorous and good at paying attention.

But what if you don’t care about being smart? What if you know that the world is designed for charismatic individuals with IQs of 110? Then you are correct! You are correct, and also, the New York Times talked to an actual doctor who claimed:

He described his own experience from last Halloween (or maybe it should be called National Enclothed Cognition Day).

Wait. Pause. Much knee slapping. Go on.

He had decided to dress as a pimp, with a fedora, long coat and cane. “When I entered the room, I glided in,” he said. “I felt a very different presence.”

So if you want to be clever, you need to dress as a doctor. If you are actually a doctor, or otherwise, someone who wants to be cool, you should dress as a pimp.

This is why I wear a purple fedora every single day, people don’t even hear me gliding up alongside them.