When presenting new fashions to the viewing public, it’s common practice to put them on people who look as good in them as it’s possible for anyone to look. Which is why, after seeing this pink and red Giambattista Valli creation on both a runway model and super cute actress Emma Stone, I was fairly confident that my hatred of it was both comprehensive and fair. Pink + red + huge growths tacked onto guntal region = this outfit doesn’t look good on anyone, not even an actress who, in addition to being tiny and cute, has an incredibly likeable public persona.

“But what if we put it on Kirsten Dunst?” Canadian fashion mag Flare asks. “And style her hair and makeup all pretty, and pose her in a sassy manner like so? What then?” I’ll tell you what then. You then have a cover featuring a lovely, expensively coiffed actress (who, I should add, is currently in the midst of staging a “comeback”), working her sexyface for all it’s worth, completely obscured by a clashing outfit and giant pink testicles. There, I said it. I’m not sure which Giambattista PR rep keeps pushing this atrocity on otherwise sensible celebrities and editors, but for the good of eyeballs everywhere (not to mention Kirsten Dunst’s career), he or she seriously needs to stop.