Everyone has something to say about the red carpet this week, which is fine because I missed the whole thing and still want to make snarky comments about pretty people dressed up in beautiful clothes. I, myself, attended a pretty glamorous event this weekend… a wedding. Okay, it wasn’t the Oscars. But it was an excuse to straighten my hair and put in my contacts, which counts as glamorous for me.

There I was in my tasteful pencil skirt, politely making small talk and picking at my prime rib. Across the room, a woman caught my eye. The easiest way for me to describe her dress is that I would expect to see it on Kim Kardashian. It was low-cut, tight, short and very sparkly. And her hair was down with big, wavy, sex kitten curls. And she hadn’t spared on the eye liner. Let me be perfectly honest – the woman looked hot. She had every ounce of confidence and other God-given gifts necessary to pull this look off.
But she was at a wedding. With her husband and toddler. And by the way, little hands are not forgiving when it comes to low-cut necklines.

So here’s my dilemma. I don’t like the thought we have to stop being attractive women once we have a child. I think mothers still should be able to feel sexy and attractive, no matter how much mileage they’ve put on their uterus. I hope that every once a while, I still look attractive myself, and not in a maternal way.

No matter how much I want mothers to be able to feel sexy, I kept looking at this woman with a little bit of shock. My thought was, first, this is a wedding! Second, it’s a wedding where you’re taking a lot of family pictures, because everyone’s all dressed up. And if you’re son, who’s only a year old now and just enjoys the easy access to his dinner, sees these pictures when he’s older, he’s going to be kind of embarrassed. Not in a, “Dad, what were you thinking with those bell bottoms?” or “Mom, seriously, how did you get those bangs so high?” type of way. (At least, these are the questions I had to ask my parents.) This kid is going to be embarrassed in a “Stifler’s mom” kind of way.
So I need to ask, how much is too much when it comes to motherhood and provocative clothing? Could you ever wear a JWoww inspired design after you’ve had a child?

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