You can always count on Pretty Little Liars to be exciting, ridiculous, and full of impractical outfits— and last night’s Season 5 premiere did not disappoint. Here’s our (spoiler-filled) rundown of the 10 least sensible clothing items featured in “EscApe from New York.”
1. Melissa’s leopard print scarf. If you had an appointment with your parents to reveal a dark secret from your troubled past, what would you wear? Leopard, probably.
2. Mona’s turtleneck dress. Nothing says “I’m a potentially evil criminal mastermind who’s also kind of sexy and also has to dress in ambiguous clothes that don’t give away what season it is because the writers are trying to distract us from the fact that we’ve been in our senior year of high school for three chronological years” quite like a turtleneck dress.
3. Shawna’s gunman hoodie. When we see her at the hospital, she’s wearing a denim jacket and a white t-shirt, so she must’ve gone home to change. Everyone knows it’s you, Shawna! All you’re accomplishing with that undercover hoodie is making it look like you’re up to no good! Was the dramatic effect of wearing all black really worth it?
4. A’s leather gloves. We’re not sure which A is the one sending this text (or how come their iMessage bubbles are black), but I can tell you one thing: it’s not practical to try to use a touchscreen in leather gloves.
5. A’s black mask that was still penetrable by pepper spray. If you’re gonna go for the full mask, at least make sure Ali can’t blind you through it.
6. Spencer’s choker sweater. What’s with that extra piece of fabric around her neck? I’m so confused.
7. Alison’s maxi dress. Correct me if I’m wrong, but based on the timeline of this series, it seems like this flashback should have been set in 2011. No fifteen-year-old girls were wearing maxi dresses in suburban Pennsylvania in 2011. They weren’t a thing yet.
8. Emily’s plaid shirt. Did she start her period somewhere between the rooftop shooting and the pushed-off-a-theater-stage murder? Is she wearing that shirt around her waist to cover the stain? I can’t see any other good reason for her to have an extra layer dangling off her hips when she’s in the middle of a dangerous mission.
9. Cece’s Vivian Darkbloom getup. First of all, this is the laziest disguise I’ve ever seen. Second of all, I’m pretty sure the TSA makes you take off your giant sunglasses and Carmen Sandiego hat before you board an aircraft.
10. Aria’s entire outfit. You can always count on Aria to be wearing something both utterly insane and totally impractical for whatever’s going on, and she didn’t disappoint last night. She paired a long, dangly skirt (smart choice) over animal print leggings (subtle), with a glittery graphic tee (incognito!), and approximately ten thousand scarves. Tie it all together with some loose-fitting boots that could easily fall off while running, and you’ve got yourself the perfect outfit for a midnight expedition.
Photos via ABC Family’s Pretty Little Liars