Good Morning America had celebrity stylist Rachel Zoe on to discuss Kate Middleton’s North American tour outfits today, and she had nothing but nice things to say. I kept hoping she’d wrinkle her face and say something just a liiiittle bit mean, as she does from time to time, but I guess Rachel is as much under the OMG-royal-couple’s spell as everyone else seems to be. To hear her talk, you’d think Kate is a bona fide genius for picking out something from her nice designer wardrobe and putting it on her body each day…sometimes multiple times per day.
“She’s wearing, like, three to four outfits a day,” Zoe says. “That’s really hard to do.” Come again? In my mental catalog of “things that are hard”–earn a living IN THIS ECONOMY, cartwheels (which I still have yet to fucking master), math–“wearing outfits” falls somewhere between remembering to eat (another one that seems to confound Zoe) and tying one’s own shoes.
Rachel marvels at many other things as well, including the length of Kate’s dresses (she is the first person ever to wear dresses that hit just above the knee!), the fact that she does it all by herself (not counting the gigantic amount of money she’s given to spend on such things), and the fact that she doesn’t burn each outfit after wearing it once (according to Zoe, this makes her “human and approachable.”)
Kate certainly looks lovely in all the photos I’ve seen of her, but I don’t think any of the aforementioned acts are really deserving of applause. I have yet to see her take a single sartorial risk, and she seems to have a knack for finding the most basic items Alexander McQueen has ever put out. There’s nothing wrong with this, but it does not make her a fashion savant. It makes her a beautiful, famous and wealthy young woman wearing appropriately nice clothes. I mean, what did we expect Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge, to wear on her very public tour of the U.S. and Canada…a goddamn potato sack?
As an aside, this reminds me of the time I assisted on a fashion shoot and the “stylist” (a b-list celeb) put two sweaters on two models. Then he put a red scarf on one of them. “You really killed it with that scarf, man,” said the photographer. “I’m really feeling it.” For this he was paid $800. Am I missing something crucial here, or are some fashion people constantly high on ecstasy? Because that’s the only thing I can think of that would make such quotidian decisions seem profound.