Roberto Cavalli with dog Lupo

Roberto Cavalli with Lupo (presumably) for Harper’s Bazaar

Roberto Cavalli is, hands down, one of our favorite fashion crazy people. We have devoted a lot of blog space to celebrating his bottomless eccentricity–we brainstormed ideas for his Cavalli Club, we imagined conversations between he and Silvio Berlusconi and most dear to us of all, we came up with a helpful checklist of things he can do to be more like God (an apparent concern of his).

Anyway, the reliably bizarre maestro of leopard print and tiny hemlines gave Harper’s Bazaar a breakdown of a typical day in his weird life and, true to form, didn’t disappoint in the mystifying quotes department. We attempted to choose our favorites but it was almost impossible. Here we go:

“I cannot sleep when I am dressed. I have to be naked. I am like Marilyn Monroe: She said five drops of Chanel No. 5; I tell you 10 drops of Roberto Cavalli fragrance.”

“When I wake up, my German shepherd, Lupo, jumps on the bed and starts to kiss me. He is a fantastic son. I also have a cat. She is tiny but she eats everything. Then I have my bird, a parrot, a big yellow-and-blue parrot, in the living room. Maybe she says hello to me. I go to her with a small cake and she eats it.”

“I used to have a small tiger and a monkey but not anymore. The monkey was mean.”

“One light black sweater. Cavalli panties, something zebra, leopard. Very tight. I put on Cavalli socks.”

“I went to Papua New Guinea a couple of years ago and met one of the last cannibal tribes existing on the planet. Very exciting!”

“I enjoy many forms of transportation. I love my boat. The hull’s paint has a wonderful ever-changing color, obtained with special paint that I also used to paint my helicopter.”

“I have many crystal balls in my house. My wife loves to collect them, and I also love them because they are mysterious, which is why I decided to create some for my home collection. And I like all the women. Femininity is my biggest source of inspiration.”

“On Twitter I write what I think, what I feel. I make a lot of tweets, maybe 20 to 35.”

“When I go to bed, oh, my God, it is very private. It is very private because there are a lot of fantasies.”

Your day is now quantifiably better!

You can read the rest at Harper’s because, obviously, there are a few more gems in the full thing.