If you told us a year ago that Sarah Jessica Parker would become a regular of the Fashion Disaster feature, we would not have believed you even a little bit. In fact, we might have been so offended by the suggestion that we would have challenged you to a duel for her fashion honor. But somehow she has stunned us with two notable fashion disasters in just a month. Kim Kardashian is on the cover of Vogue. Sarah Jessica Parker is dressing badly. What has the fashion world come to?!
Fashion icon Sarah Jessica Parker turned up to the DVF Awards last night wearing a Diane Von Furstenberg dress that featured two different types of lamé in a fight for supremacy that nobody was going to win, least of all Sarah Jessica Parker. Most of the time we consider metallics to be neutral, but in this case all her colors and textures were so one-note we couldn’t figure out where to look. Everything was bronze and shiny, from her ombré hair to tips of her tan little toes.
Between this and her recent appearance in red lace over an all-business white button-down shirt over a pair of sheer black stirrup-footed pantyhose, we’re becoming suspicious that Sarah Jessica Parker has been replaced by a less stylish pod person. Sure, this dress is far from the worst we’ve ever seen, but we’re used to seeing Parker in only the very best. When a noted style icon like Sarah Jessica Parker comes in on a flat note, we start to worry she’s been replaced by a less-stylish alien lifeform.