Virgin Atlantic is offering you a new way to hit on people while flying! I’m surprised. Here are some things I think of when I think about airplanes:
- Not having enough leg room, ever. Actually not being able to cross my legs for whole hours at a time. Whole long, torturous hours.
- Magazines never being long enough. They’re never long enough, not considering the fact that I invariably lose power on my computer two hours into the flight.
- Carefully watching the wing so I can alert the pilot in case it falls off.
- Also, watching for any Twilight Zone monsters on the wing. That’s a thing that could happen.
- After Flight, I frankly spend a lot of time hoping my pilot does cocaine, because it makes you really good at flying planes.
Here are somethings I do not think about when I think about airplanes:
- Sexual rituals
- Sexual rituals that can be performed without moving my body a single inch.
- Sexy sex.
All that is about to change! Thank you, Virgin Atlantic! The LA Times reports that they’re now going to allow you to send you fellow passengers drinks on the plane. Apparently:
Virgin America kicked off service from Los Angeles to Las Vegas on Monday and rolled out a new in-flight system that allows a passenger to anonymously send a perfect stranger a cool cocktail during the flight. Yes, it’s a flirty seat-to-seat way to hit on someone in midair.
Okay, it’s still going to be tricky to actually approach people, because your legs will be asleep. So you will be stumbling over to them like a zombie after sending someone a drink. But this will maybe give me something to look forward to about flying other than… other than nothing, really. It will give me one potentially good thing that could happen during a flight.
Picture via Virgin Atlantic