bridal showers

Anyone can roll their eyes at the wedding industry. It’s easy — TLC practically reformatted its entire programming schedule to accommodate “Say Yes to the Dress,” “My Fair Wedding,” “A Wedding Story,” and “Four Weddings.” And while tying the knot can be an enormous waste of time and money, at least it can be redeemed by the promise of love, happiness, and the promise of lifetime commitment.

But what about bridal showers? Decades ago, women often went from their father’s house to their new husband’s. What better way to sell, I mean, send them off in style than a party thrown by their mother in which all of her friends give her kitchen supplies and recipes? Now, women often live with their fiancés for years before he pops the question. So lunching in the name of a little bridal luck seems outdated at best. Or, led by a crowd of well-intentioned lady friends, they’re condescendingly misogynistic at worst.

Enough already! These are the seven soul-crushing-est reasons why bridal showers are pretty much the devil.