In The Misery of Man Without God Pascal said we seek “only the chase, not the quarry.” The rest of that essay is largely about how he thinks Montaigne is a gluttonous, mistress-loving asshole, before concluding that he hates Montaigne because he hates himself. Pascal was probably a weird person to hang out with! But he might have been right about that whole loving the chase thing, because we just read on YourTango that:
According to the [Universiry of Virginia] study, “college women viewed the Facebook profiles of four male students who had previously seen their profiles. They were told that the men (a) liked them a lot, (b) liked them only an average amount, or (c) liked them either a lot or an average amount (uncertain condition).”
Which men do you think women were most attracted to?
Answer: (d) Montaigne.
No! Joking. It was C. Of course it was C. Good for you for guessing correctly.
Amanda Chatel backs them up claiming:
Yes, women do enjoy positive attention from men, even the ones we’d never consider dating, but it’s the guy who’s playing coy, the one with whom we can’t tell whether he’s flirting or not — that gets us every time. It’s hard to like someone who puts all their cards on the table. It’s as though there was no effort to be had, the challenge has been subtracted from the equation, and you’re left with this mentality of “What now?”
Maybe that’s true – the chase is fun! The butterflies in your stomach! But at the end of the day, don’t you just want someone who gets your jokes and likes the same TV you do? Ultimately, we don’t really want to have to pursue someone for 10 years, right?
This is something we get over? Eventually? Maybe? To all the wedded and bedded ladies out there, were you the chaser or the quarry?