Self love is the best love.

Self love is the best love.

It seems my colleague Sam didn’t bring her vibrator with her to Portland. This makes her sad. It wasn’t that she forgot it, but in her words, “I knew somebody who had to have theirs taken apart because it was large and ‘suspicious’ (since there were metal parts inside) and that freaked me the fuck out.” Sam likes to swear a lot.

It makes sense (the fear, not the swearing, or I guess maybe both), that one would be afraid of such a sticky situation. And as we’ve seen in several cases in the past the TSA isn’t exactly down with you carrying any type of sex toy on a plane, and if they are, they’re likely to leave you a comment that will have your stomach turning. No one likes to read “Get your freak on, girl,” from a stranger because they eye-spied the vibrator in your luggage.

I told Sam that she probably could have avoided anything weird had she removed the batteries, packed them separately and checked her bag. However, checking her bag wasn’t an option for complicated flying details I won’t get into, so Sam currently resides in a vibrator-less world until she finds a shop in Portland that will fill the void in her life. Oh, Sam.

Personally, I have never considered traveling with a vibrator. It’s not a fear that I might have my sexuality discovered (oh no!), it’s just never crossed my mind. I figure if push comes to shove, I have hands. Granted, they do not produce the same outcome in such a short amount of time, but sometimes that’s just how it goes. Life can’t always be immediate orgasms and chocolates.

As I prepare for my trip abroad, I’m flirting with the idea of bringing a vibrator with me this time. Obviously, I know how to pack it (batteries separate!) and since I’m checking a bag, I don’t have to worry about a face-to-face confrontation in which a TSA agent may wave it around suspecting that it’s some high-tech, well-disguised bomb.

Have you ever traveled with your vibrator? If so, have you endured any horrific situations with the TSA you’d like to share?

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