It’s nice the way, as a child, you’re taught to believe that the impossible is possible. You believe that you can be a professional basketball player even if you’re only 5 feet. You believe that time travel is very close to being mastered (I still believe this, I have to because otherwise life would be too bleak). You believe that there was a chance, even a tiny chance, that Mario and Princess Peach could have made their relationship work. There never was, kiddo. There never was. In fact, there are a lot of pairings that would have been doomed in real life. For instance: