Ready for your head to reel with wonder about how amazing people are?

$3,250. Because it has diamonds, all the diamonds! Okay, only 28 of them. 28 diamonds, and it’s made out of platinum, so that is… odd. I mean, it’s not as though people will see your diamond encrusted vibrator and be impressed that you’re a person of wealth and means (the way they might be with a fancy coat or handbag) or come over to your house to admire your sex toys (as they might with art). I guess this is specifically designed for people who just think that diamonds are tingly. I’m pretty sure that only happens if you have a uniquely pure soul. It’s also available in 24-Karat gold!