bad in bedWhen I look back at my dating past I cringe. I’m sure we all do. From the outfits we considered to be date-suitable even just a few years ago, to the bullshit we now realize we put up with for far too long, everyones dating history has some high points, but probably even some more lower points. Dating is hard, you guys.

What’s probably even harder than dating is having a relationship, because by the time you land someone you think is worthy of your time and love it’s time to put in the extra effort to make it work. But sometimes, actually a lot of the time, relationships are hard. Relationships aren’t supposed to be easy, compromise isn’t a walk in the park, and give and take is something that not everyone has the ability to pull off, especially when there’s something a bit off in the bedroom.

It’s really sad when the person you love just isn’t very good at the sexy times. It doesn’t make them more difficult to love, but it does put a strain on the relationship because as sexual beings sex is a really important part of committing to someone.

Of the few times I’ve been in love, there was one in particular who was just awful in bed. I’m not sure if it was his lack of interest in what I wanted or just simple laziness, but it just wasn’t good. For a long time, I refused to admit this to friends and even to myself. I also, as sure as balls (that’s a saying now, right?) was never, ever going to tell him. Had I thought he and I were going to be together for the long run, I probably would have, but the investment, from both our ends, just wasn’t there. I guess that’s why we live our lives without each other now.

But now I’m a wee bit wiser, definitely older, and more in touch with the fact that if you’re going to make a relationship work, you need to open the lines of communication on ALL topics, even the ones that seem awkward as hell. If I were with that aforementioned person these days, I’d speak up, lay down the law, and admit that I can count on one hand all the times that sex was, at most, decent with him.

So, if your partner isn’t so great in bed, you need to speak up. YOU HAVE TO FOR THE SAKE OF HUMANITY. You just need to do it in such a way that you don’t ruin your relationship in process.

Photo: Fox