The Nerve Bad Sex book contains many useful bits of information, such as why you should not have sex with closeted gay Republicans on the internet or allow your cat to fall in love with you. But it also contains this passage, aka one of the best pieces of sex advice ever, by Ari Cohen:

You will never get an erotic massage from a well-endowed man. The large-cocked among us feel that they don’t have anything to prove, which in the domain of the male ego is bad news. They think that they are doing you a favor by offering you their dick, unaware that stores sell similar products  in silicone and plastic. My ideal man is reasonably-sized, but worried that he’s small, and thereby offers a full menu of additional services.

THIS. When your choices come down to a) guy who is large and might leave you walking bowlegged tomorrow and b) dude who is normal-sized but will also engage in foreplay and is super grateful you’re doing it with him, always, always go with option B.