You meet somebody, perhaps at a bar, through a friend, or on a little ol’ dating app. You find them attractive, you make plans, and tada! You’re on your first date. Everything’s going fine, but then they do something so unpleasant, you can no longer take the evening seriously. Bam. It’s done, and you’re already sorting out which Netflix you’ll watch when you get home because hell knows you’re not bringing anybody back now.
Since going through a rather unfun breakup back in March, I have been on a lot of first dates. While my binge dating experiences were awkward, strange, and occasionally very enjoyable, they were also educational regarding how “normal” dating works. Having primarily fallen into relationships with people I already knew for years, it was a very different experience to actually go on a formal first date with dinner and drinks and uncomfortably long pauses in between describing that, yes, blogging is a “real job.”
One thing I learned is how to spot warning signs; seemingly small actions that people do on first dates that are instant red flags, showing me very quickly that this person and I won’t get along.
Least Attractive Thing #1: Not Tipping.
(via Game Of Laughs)
Are you kidding me? Whether we just had dinner, drinks, or a couple of particularly good coffees at a sit-down cafe, if you’re one of those Mr. Pink/Reservoir Dogs/I-don’t-believe-in-tipping jerks, I assure you, we will never go out again. And I will glare at you as I take my wallet back out to leave extra money on the table, possibly doing so egregiously enough that the server sees your deliberate inaction and shames you with glares, as well. Seriously, people who don’t tip are The Worst (unless you’re in a country that gives servers living wages, etc.), not to mention incredibly embarrassing.
Least Attractive Thing #2: Criticizing my job.
As I mentioned earlier, people have this tendency to consider blogging “not a real job.” Oddly enough, this remark often comes from people in the music, writing, and artistic industries–many of whom work freelance. They’re always shocked that I work in an office for a large media company, my title includes the word “Editor,” and I have a 401K and benefits. And yet, I’ve still been on dates where people criticize or mock my job, as though it’s not “real” because it’s on the Internet. On the bright side, when somebody does this after asking me what I do for a living, I begin looking forward to my pleasant walk home alone.
There are other ones (salad shaming, using derogatory language, flip flops with sandals, an affinity for Terry Richardson, and so forth), but those are the big two for me.What are your biggest turnoffs on a first date? Tell us in the comments–and if you’ve got any weird stories, we’d love to hear those, too!