She knows more about love than you.

She knows more about love than you.

Admittedly, I’ve never seen Millionaire Matchmaker. It’s just not my thing. And the few matchmakers with whom I’ve had contact here in New York City for interviewing purposes just seem so confused as to how to score a man. Although I’m not looking to land a millionaire, so maybe I’m the confused one.

Our friends at TheFrisky recently interviewed Patti Stanger, and got some fairly interesting responses on dating and feminism. For example, you should never give out your last name when you’re dating so as to avoid being friended by a date on Facebook. Why? “You have one bad picture on that Facebook, you’re toast.” Bad photos are going to fuck up your prospects to secure a husband. So take it from Stanger and keep your last name under wraps, lady friends. In fact, if you’ve friended someone you’re dating, unfriend them now. Now.

Also, you can’t blame rom-coms for your false hope in love. Stanger knows this to be fact because she watches them all the time with her boyfriend. With her boyfriend. Who she watches aforementioned rom-coms with seems irrelevant, but she watches them with her boyfriend. In case you were wondering, now you know. So, no, Lloyd Dobler didn’t fuck you up; rom-coms are the new reality.

Often considered anti-feminist, Stanger had a response to that:

No. Crap! I am equal pay for equal dollar. We are making more money than men but we don’t get equal pay. When it comes to dating I want my car door opened. I want him to make a reservation or he ain’t getting this [motions towards her vagina]. Once I give this up [motions towards her vagina], I give up all my power.

Nope, you “ain’t getting” vagina action unless you make a dinner reservation, gentlemen. And once you give up your vagina, ladies, you give up your power. The mind reels at how this makes any sense, but as we’ve learned in the past, some of us just aren’t on the same page as Stanger.


Photo: WENN