“Who do I have to bang to get an advance copy of the new @coldplay album? I mean, really.” – Gwyneth Paltrow, on husband Chris Martin’s new album.

“The best vagina tattoo I’ve ever seen…she had a square of pubic hair shaved, and a little man with a lawnmower walking along.” – Olivia Wilde, telling Conan about the best vagina tattoo she’s ever seen.

“I’m still a goddess. I’m just not Charlie’s goddess.” – Bree Olson [link NSFW], on life after Sheen.