sex test

What’s your number?

Sam sent me this sex test just a bit ago. It was very nice of her to try to add to my persistent preoccupation with procrastination. Sam is good like that. Because I’m one for taking tests — as each question is usually about me — I immediately got busy. And it was hard.

While I can plug in the number of my “sexual partners” (give or take a few in either direction), it was difficult to remember ages, and even harder to remember the ages of these partners in relation to where they showed up in my sexual history. There was also the fact of what is a “sexual partner?” Are we talking just intercourse, no intercourse, but oral sex? It wasn’t easy. I probably failed.

You may have heard of Six Degrees of Separation. It’s the idea that we’re all just six connections away from everyone else on the planet. This is the inspiration for Sex Degrees of Separation. By answering the questionnaire below we will be able to calculate the number of indirect (and direct) sexual partners you have had, going back six degrees of separation.

The concept is a means to show just how many people with whom they’re not only sleeping with directly, but indirectly, too. Even when I typed in that I had had just one partner, so I could see exactly what the hell the deal is, the total was far more than a basketball team. In fact, it was more like hundreds of basketballs teams.

Do I feel slut-shamed that my number is over 28 million people? No. Do I think this test is a joke? I don’t know, but it definitely makes a point. Is Sam not getting a half-birthday gift from me this year? Probably. But that’s just because I’m cheap in 2013.

Take the test and see how you feel about it.

Via Lloyd’s Pharmacy