Last week, College Candy published a list outlining the ten reasons it sucks to live with your boyfriend. It seems that Melanie, the Northeastern student who penned the article, recently moved her boyfriend in to share a two-bedroom apartment with her and her roommate. But it’s not all giggles and post-pubescent sex.

Melanie is unhappy because living with her boyfriend isn’t like the 24/7 romantic comedy she pictured. I assume it’s the college girl lifestyle that Melanie’s boyfriend imposed on. Her biggest complaints are largely based on the male presence in her girl nest. No more watching crappy E! shows, holing up in the bathroom for two hours to perfect those smoky eyes, eating ice cream for dinner (oh, to have a college metabolism again) or walking around like a slob in crusty sweatpants.

The thing is Melanie, when you move in with your boyfriend, you’re not just lovers: you’re roommates. Which means everything that ever bugged you about living with someone—the dishes, the electric bill, the volume of the TV in the living room when you’re trying to sleep—nips at the heels of your relationship.

Here are ten (real) reasons cohabitating sucks:

1. Design isn’t mine. Your space isn’t yours anymore. If you’ve recently lived alone or with a roommate, you were used to your own style and furniture. That means your nesting doll collection and penchant for green wicker tables was your problem. But put two minds in one space, and you no longer have your own enclave of personal design. You don’t have your own room anymore—you just have a bedroom. Even worse: there’s a good chance his nautical posters and sports memorabilia won’t match and you’ll be in a cold war of clashing home décor.

2. Sharing is caring. Sure, everything you own is still, technically, yours. But not really. Watch as he takes over your couch, breaks your unbreakable umbrella and stains your pillowcases with his drool. Aw, isn’t he the best?

3. Bills, bills, bills. The cable bill, the electric bill, the moving bill—pretty soon, all these expenses start to add up. But money is a sensitive topic. When I lived with roommates, I was careful to leave friendly notes or casually bring up IOUs when we were hanging out or watching tv. Same goes with your man. Don’t get passive aggressive when it comes to bills. Hanging up statements and deleting saved shows on the DVR is not the answer.

4. Cleanliness is next to slob-liness. It is a known rule of cohabitating that no two people are equally clean. And the apartment is never half messy. Chances are one of you is cleaner than the other, and that can cause a lot of friction in a relationship. Some men or women don’t mind cleaning up after their honey. The rest of us, it goes without saying, resent it. A lot.

5. Food, glorious food. He will eat all of your food. All of it. Even your low-fat frozen yogurt that doesn’t even taste that great. Here, try this experiment: cook an entire Thanksgiving dinner, enough to feed a family of four and provide leftovers all week. Casually mention you’ve made dinner and put all of it on your kitchen table. You’ll be lucky if he leaves you with enough to scrape together for a packed lunch the next day.

6. Be a sport. They will enter your household and they will never leave. It’s like he’s having an affair with sports right in front of you. In your own house. You can’t believe you were ever paranoid about lunches with his cute coworker. You would kill for him to hang out with Sheila more and shut the eff up about his team.

7. The bathroom diaries. Forget wasting time in the bathroom working on those perfect smoky eyes. What about all of that empty mirror time? You know, those hours you spend peering in the lighted mega-magnifying mirror examining your pores, plucking stray chin hairs, popping blackheads and scrubbing your face until it’s raw? Yeah. You’re lucky if you get that back. Instead, your bathroom sink will be full of little black hairs and shaving cream residue—not really the alone-time accoutrements you wanted.

8. The fixer. When you were single and something went wrong, you’d call the super or someone from the yellow pages. Dishwasher spewing out buckets of foam? Shower rod in need of hanging? Suddenly, your man wants to exert his masculinity on these common household dilemmas. But unless you’ve moved in with a plumber or an honest to god handyman, he’s going to screw it up and make it worse. It’s like Murphy’s law, but worse. Anything that can go wrong will be made even worse by your boyfriend.

9. Sex tapes. The sex just isn’t as exciting when you’re living together. There’s no thrill. You can be as loud as you want, you know where all the condoms are, there’s no tip-toeing to the bathroom and you’ve abolished the risk of getting caught. You’re going to have to put some extra effort in the bedroom, which—after cleaning up after the food you’ve made and the mess he’s created—will not sound appealing. I suggest mirrors and a video camera.

10. The mystery is gone. Okay, Melanie. You were right. The sex isn’t as exciting, you’ve bugged him about the electricity bill, he hates your bedspread and, as you reminded me, he knows that your underwear collection is not made up of “all cute thongs from VS.” Now it’s all out there. Everything. Your bowel movements, your filthy sweatpants and your weird habits.

But isn’t that—number ten, the big reveal—the best part about moving in with a guy? Sure, the mating ritual is fun. I love first dates, and I love playing the game. But when the mystery is gone, so is the stress and the secrets and the make-believe. It’s not a romantic comedy. I’m a real person, and I have my flaws. So does my boyfriend. But I love him, nasty habits and appetite be damned.

That’s why we moved in together.