You’d think that drunk people were more likely to cheat, since drunk people are more likely to lose their inhibitions and do stuff they regret later. But a new study says otherwise: there is a correlation between countries with high rates of alcohol consumption and high rates of relationship fidelity. The scientists will break it down for you:
Historically, we find a correlation between the shift from polygyny to monogamy and the growth of alcohol consumption. Cross-culturally we also find that monogamous societies consume more alcohol than polygynous societies in the preindustrial world.
The study claims that monogamy was introduced way back in the days of ancient Greece and Rome, both of which were big drinking societies. When wine-making spread throughout the rest of Europe, so did monogamy.
You hear this, people? The couples that get shitfaced together stays together. And they say you can’t meet a quality man at a bar.