Another day, another story about an actress who’s just ugly enough to act. Today’s homely actress is the incredibly gross Keira Knightley. You may know her from from Pride and Prejudice or Atonement or the bottom of your trash can. More
Lindsay Lohan’s court outfit is probably about a 7 on the inappropriate scale. I will explain why. More
So, Courtney Stodden has created an alter ego, the drunken, swearing Courtland, who you can see in all her glory, here, contending that she still has some of her dignity. More
Jean Harlow had the worst death in the entire world. More
Shailene Woodley is probably not hot enough to be Spiderman’s girlfriend because he’s not a real person and no amount of hotness could will him into being. More
I just want you to know that the people in this picture are cool, cooler than any group of people you will ever hang out with. They are so cool that when you realize who they are, you are just going to just eat some vending machine food and feel sad about your life because, fuck it, it will never be that good. You might as well eat all of the Famous Amos cookies. More
I know some time has passed since Kill Bill, which is what Uma Thurman looks like in my head, forever, but I think Uma Thurman looks… different. Different in a plastic surgery sort of way? Here. Here is the picture of her from the recent Giorgio Armani show at Paris Fashion Week. More
When I was in middle school, there was this home economics teacher with big blonde hair and a very flat voice whom everybody believed had been in Playboy. In retrospect, I kind of doubt it; I’m pretty positive it was just a rumor started by bored preteens, but I remember it being so exotic and fascinating-sounding. It did not, however, remotely distract anybody from doing their work. More
And if Bradley Cooper is dating Jennifer Lawrence, because Silver Linings Playbook just sparked a crazy romance, what do we call them? Brennifer? It sounds like the kind of breakfast pastry you’d get in Prague. I’m behind that, actually. More
Remember that exceptionally dramatic scene in Liz & Dick where Lindsay Lohan, playing Elizabeth Taylor, declares that she can’t live without Richard Burton and runs down a hallway to gobble down a fistful of pills? You ain’t seen nothing until you’ve seen her in The Canyons.
Full disclosure, I have no idea whatsoever what is happening in this scene from The Canyons with her and James Deen, other than that cannot be her phone: More
Guys, I know we are excited that Jodie Foster supposedly came out at the Golden Globes, but she already came out in 2007. She actually gave a moving tribute to her girlfriend. It was a whole thing. It was a whole thing that Jodie Foster came out and revealed her over decade long relationship with her girlfriend Cyndey Bernard in 2007 during a a Women in Entertainment breakfast. That was five years ago, in case people were keeping track. More
Princess Grace of Monaco supposedly almost killed herself over Bing Crosby. More
Look, I’ve seen Friends. I know there were times when Jennifer Aniston was funny. She’s amazingly charming all through Friends. I have laughed at things her character did on the show! But maybe that was just the writing and the strength of the other cast members, and something about the time period? And the haircut?
Because, when I watch her in ads like this one I realize that she is really, terribly, terribly unfunny. More