Topic: actress

Ex-Porn Actress Stacie Halas Blocked From Returning To Teach Middle School

Ex-Porn Actress Stacie Halas Blocked From Returning To Teach Middle School

When I was in middle school, there was this home economics teacher with big blonde hair and a very flat voice whom everybody believed had been in Playboy. In retrospect, I kind of doubt it; I’m pretty positive it was just a rumor started by bored preteens, but I remember it being so exotic and fascinating-sounding. It did not, however, remotely distract anybody from doing their work. More »

Watch Lindsay Lohan Be Exceptionally Dramatic In The Canyons

Watch Lindsay Lohan Be Exceptionally Dramatic In The Canyons

Remember that exceptionally dramatic scene in Liz & Dick where Lindsay Lohan, playing Elizabeth Taylor, declares that she can’t live without Richard Burton and runs down a hallway to gobble down a fistful of pills? You ain’t seen nothing until you’ve seen her in The Canyons.

Full disclosure, I have no idea whatsoever what is happening in this scene from The Canyons with her and James Deen, other than that cannot be her phone: More »

Guys, Jodie Foster Already Came Out In 2007

Guys, Jodie Foster Already Came Out In 2007

Guys, I know we are excited that Jodie Foster supposedly came out at the Golden Globes, but she already came out in 2007. She actually gave a moving tribute to her girlfriend. It was a whole thing. It was a whole thing that Jodie Foster came out and revealed her over decade long relationship with her girlfriend Cyndey Bernard in 2007 during a a Women in Entertainment breakfast. That was five years ago, in case people were keeping track. More »

Maybe Jennifer Aniston Just Isn’t Funny

Maybe Jennifer Aniston Just Isn't Funny

Look, I’ve seen Friends. I know there were times when Jennifer Aniston was funny. She’s amazingly charming all through Friends. I have laughed at things her character did on the show! But maybe that was just the writing and the strength of the other cast members, and something about the time period? And the haircut?

Because, when I watch her in ads like this one I realize that she is really, terribly, terribly unfunny. More »

Lindsay Lohan Is Now Playing Bar Mitzvahs

Lindsay Lohan Is Now Playing Bar Mitzvahs

Look, I think the million dollar question here is not “how is Lindsay Lohan financially in a position wherein she has to play bat mitzvahs to make money. I think we know that. The answer is “bad choices.” I think the questions is “what is Lindsay Lohan going to do at a bat mitzvah to make her a worthwhile addition?”

I hoped that maybe she was going to throw a drink in some kid’s face, because that would be amazing, and kids can be really unruly at bar and bat mitzvahs, but, no, I am wrong. That is not going to happen. More »

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