Look, personally, I don’t think male shopaholics deserve to be objects of ridicule. I think that is something reserved exclusively for Buzz Bissinger. I think that largely because his GQ piece on his penchant for buying leather jackets reads like the parts of American Psycho that Bret Easton Ellis must have written when he was most hungover. I mean, look at this stuff. Just look. You cannot tell them apart. In fact, I challenge you to tell them apart. Now. Go. To try to keep them as anonymous as possible, I’m just going to put American Psycho screengrabs with all the quotes, but if you prefer to imagine Buzz Bissinger looking hilarious and pointing at the screen, you can. And answers are at the end! More
Nothing but the title: 10%. Likely inscrutable, almost certainly excessively highbrow.
A person or persons in white robes standing near a pillar: 25%. Might be worth a gamble; might be outrageously dull.
A person or persons in white robes, standing near a pillar, in front of a background with two or more moons in the sky: 80%. Almost certainly excellent. Approaches 100% if there is a cat of unusual size somewhere near the spine.
Part of a woman’s face: 5%. Almost certainly a memoir of worst kind.
Part of a woman’s face, hazily obscured: 1%.
Rippling water: 0%. -10% if there is a woman’s face visible beyond the rippling water (the 10% means I will go watch a very bad movie instead). More
As you may have heard, book lovers everywhere are outraged over the sexy makeover one publisher gave Anne Shirley, beloved protagonist of the Anne Of Green Gables series. As you can see, someone saw fit to replace that unsexy, ginger haired ten-year-old with a buxom blonde just dying for a roll in the hay. Amazon has since removed the offending image, but why stop there? This problem goes way beyond Anne Shirley. Here are nine other fictional characters who’ve been inappropriately made over on book covers. I hope you’re in the mood to yell at your computer screen. More
If you need to write a break-up letter (either because you have been broken up with, or because you are a heartbreaker yourself) you’re surely going to want to take advice from some famous authors who do it really, really well. Or badly. Actually, sometimes they are bad at break-up letters, too. And sort of petty! Let’s see what we can draw from this selection of famous author’s break-up letters on Flavorpill: More
The Chronicles of Narnia (any title): You won the school spelling bee but lost in the second round at the district level. You pretended not to mind (who cares about losing a stupid spelling bee?) but you did. As an adult, you either love or hate C.S. Lewis passionately. There is no middle ground, C.S. Lewis-wise. More
Previously: Part I.
Goosebumps (any title): The “tomboy” label stuck with you years after you felt that you’d grown out of it. It didn’t matter how you dressed or how you wore your hair or how quiet and low you pitched your voice; girls never told you their secret crushes and boys never bothered to tease you in the hallways. You wore dozens of thin leather bracelets on each wrist every single day. More
Are no beloved characters safe from creepiness?! More
The Outsiders: You were the first member of your peer group to discover, and later write, fanfiction.
Sweet Valley High (any title): You had an older sister. Depending on how much older she was, you found the books thrillingly racy or strangely foreign. Either way, your favorite part was always the opening description of the twins’ appearance. You can still recite their measurements like beads on a rosary. Five foot six. Perfect size six figures. More
States Ranked By Penis Size - Where Do You Live?
Tim Meadows Is Mad At SNL
Photos That Capture The Heyday of NYC's Iconic Music Venues
'Vaginal Knitting" - Watch Woman Knit From Wool Inside Her Vagina
Source: The Frisky
'127' Hours Guy Jailed For Domestic Abuse
This week marked the 50th anniversary of Sylvia Plath’s The Bell Jar. As one of Plath’s most famous works and her only novel, the book has been read and beloved by millions of people all over the world. When I was a teenager, it touched me more than almost any other book, feeding me the compassion and empathy from another voice that I had been so hungry for. For this reason, I would up getting a Bell Jar tattoo on my ribcage as an adult. More
I bet you’re never going to guess who this handsome man is. I will give you a clue. He’s famous. More
The NC-17 rated 50 Shades Of Grey movie is basically going to be soft porn. Cool! More
A compilation of the first chapter of every book where the narrator described how glamorous his or her parents looked when they used to get dress up and go out for the night.
A compilation of the first paragraph of every novel that opens with the murder of the most popular girl in school.
A compilation of every time a woman has talked about how handsome her grandfather looked in those old pictures and isn’t it a shame how nobody dances, really dances like that anymore? More
COMBINED PRINT & E-BOOK NONFICTION
ARE WOMEN TOO NICE ON THE INTERNET AND ALSO OTHER PLACES TOO? I WONDER SOMETIMES, K.R. Omner
WHITE PRESIDENTS WHO HAVE DIED, Bill O’Reilly and ghostwriter
THE TIME I DIED AND WENT TO HEAVEN, Jon Owens
I DIED AND WENT TO HEAVEN TOO SO I CAN CONFIRM JON’S DESCRIPTION, Alexander Maury
COMPELLING RISE OF AN ANIMAL THAT RACED FOR MONEY, Sarah Gibralter More