Topic: Murder

Wed Bed Dead: “I’m Going To Marry Will Smith Because His Dog Died And I Feel Bad”

Wed Bed Dead: "I'm Going To Marry Will Smith Because His Dog Died And I Feel Bad"

This week–in honor of Will Smith‘s weird love letter to Scientology that no one asked for, After Earth–we’re playing with a few of the megastar’s most popular characters: Agent J from the Men in Black franchise, Neville from the zombie/cancer/vampire blockbuster I Am Legend and himself from the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. Sidenote, do you know the backstory on why the already-successful rapper played himself on a wholesome sitcom (short answer: millions of dollars in unpaid taxes). Hard choices ahead, what with Will Smith looking equally great in a tailored suit and sideways caps and loud prints. More »

Bullish Life: I Have A New Idea For How To Reduce Rape

Bullish Life: I Have A New Idea For How To Reduce Rape

I recently did an interview in which I was asked how I became such a risk taker, and how other women can become more comfortable with risk.

I gave a long answer. Most of the time we hesitate to take risks, what we’re really afraid of isn’t jail or death: it’s embarrassment, rejection, and the feeling of failure. Those aren’t real things. Or at least you shouldn’t be cowed by them. They’re just feelings. I barely notice most of those feelings because I have a lot of projects going on, and I choose not to indulge unproductive feelings when I could instead be making future plans.

But the other part of my answer — well, I paused as I was saying it and wondered whether to keep saying it. I feel like much of my success has been contingent on doing things young women really shouldn’t do, or shouldn’t do alone. In polite society, we say, “Are you sure that’s safe?” What we really mean is, “You’re likely to get raped. Possibly murdered.”

I think about this every time I read a story about a musician who made a name for himself by traveling around the country and sleeping in his car. Women can’t really sleep in their cars. More »

Don’t Forget Not To Murder Your Girlfriend This Weekend

Don't Forget Not To Murder Your Girlfriend This Weekend

As we head into a three-day weekend, the editorial team here at The Gloss would like to remind our readers the importance of not murdering their girlfriends. Here are a few tips on how to make sure you too can avoid murdering your girlfriend.

Remember, if you and your girlfriend are having a disagreement, it’s very important not to murder her, no matter how wrong you think she is.

If you are unhappy in your relationship with your girlfriend and aren’t sure how to resolve things, try breaking up instead of committing murder. More »

What Would You Do If Your Husband Was Trying To Poison You?

What Would You Do If Your Husband Was Trying To Poison You?

I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that if your husband is trying to poison you, your first move should not be “write to Elle magazine.” Although, honestly, I do really like Jean’s advice, almost all the time, but this is insane. If you have good evidence that anyone is trying to poison you, do not pick up a pen. Do not write anyone. Pack your belongings and leave immediately. But, since I suppose it is not really that easy, A woman wrote Elle saying:

I suspect he’s putting something in my coffee. I notice it smells funny, and when I drink it, my eyes get superpuffy and swollen. I suspect he’s also adding stuff to my lotions and bath products, which created brown discolorations on my skin. My legs look as if they’re covered in snakeskin. My arms are dry as cracked earth. Same with my shampoos—whatever he’s putting in them makes my hair extremely dry and knotted. These are expensive, high-end products that I know from experience work well. My suspicions have been further aroused since he’s started ranting about my “using chemicals.” More »