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I know it has been a hard few weeks for everyone. I mean, it’s especially been a hard few weeks for people in Boston, because they have faced real evil, and, also not been able to sneak out of their one night stands as easily as they would like to. So, sometimes, in addition to “looking for the helpers” we also need to look for moments of pure joy in the world.
Like this one. Like scientists drawing a penis on Mars. More
Remember how Jon Hamm‘s allegedly gargantuan penis was allegedly distracting the whole Mad Men set so a staffer allegedly told him to wear some underwear (then reported the alleged incident to a major media outlet)? Well, he had something to say about it in his Rolling Stone interview this week. More
“Hi. My name is Johnny Cakes, and I have a limp dick.” More
You guys, I very rarely read Cosmopolitan. It’s just not my jam, and when something isn’t my jam, I steer clear of it like a plague infested rat — even if that rat is rocking a bow-tie and top hat. More
“I could find David Beckham naked in a cardboard box on my doorstep and I would drop him off at the pound.” – Olivia Wilde, explaining that she only has feelings for Jason Sudekis. More
OK — don’t get your hopes up just yet, because nothing has been released. More
Want to be just like Charlize Theron and start complimenting your co-workers’ penises? Here are few ways to work it into your normal office conversation. More
A lady – who wants you to know her man-friend does not have a small package – is slipping a donut around his penis and eating it off, all for Cosmopolitan. More
Over at Jezebel, a big donged gentleman has a post bemoaning the difficulties that go along with having a large penis. It’s called “Why I Hate My Giant Dong.” But do the ladies also hate giant dongs? Let’s find out! More
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Over at Jezebel, they’ve repurposed a post from The Good Men Project called “Why I Hate my Giant Dong.” In it, the author tells the story of how his enormous wiener has not always been the blessing many would imagine. More
No? Just me? More
Glamour Magazine has a really fun section on what women call their boyfriend’s penis. Here’s one woman’s response:
“I call his thing ‘Rockin Robin’ because one day in the shower, I grabbed it and started singing ‘Rockin’ Robin’ using it as a mike.”
Huh.
So.
That woman is a psychopath.
Anyhow! More
Remember being a pre-teen and kissing your pillow while pretending it was the boy you liked? This pillow probably explains why 12 year olds are having so many syphilis parties on Lifetime movies. – Buzzfeed
Do you have the balls to carry it? – Buzzfeed
