I’ve never classified myself as “strong.” I am afraid of the dark. I am afraid of the sun. I am afraid of unfamiliar people, surroundings and situations. I am the first person to say, “Guys, I don’t think this is a good idea” and the last person to jump the fence. But for some reason, I’m strangely calm in situations where I think I might die.
I have been faced with the very real possibility of death only twice, and I have learned that while I cry when I fall down the stairs, I do not get upset when I am hit by cars or punched in the face or when the plane seems like it might go down. More
There are a lot of things that were pretty hard to do before the Internet. For instance, meet a lot of people who have the same obscure disease or sexual fetish as you. Or get detailed directions from a particular address in Dover to a particular address in Minneapolis. Or find and purchase a song you heard on the radio (but you don’t know who it’s by, and all you remember is that it contains the words “try to find you” and “all the flowers”). More
I was recently on one of those giant winged coffins they called planes, and before I embarked, I explained a little about their giant winged coffin-ness. “Cheer up!” someone said, “maybe a hot guy will sit next to you!”
Hah! Whenever I fly, I hope that there will not be a hot guy sitting next to me. Because, you know, I got The New Dead as a Christmas present, and I’ve got some reading to do, and priorities. Priorities. Mostly I hope there will be no one next to me. If there is someone, I hope it will be a narcoleptic mute. But a lot of people are not me.
We all know what you should wear. You should probably wear a nice sweater, some attractive but comfortable jeans and a pair of shoes you can slip off easily. Personally, I probably dress better than I need to when I’m … More
I flew on a plane today. Maybe, since it’s a holiday weekend, some of you will fly, too. And maybe, like someone writing this post, you’ll have nightmares the night before about the plane going down in flames. I have … More