Topic: Star Wars
Don’t lie: how much do you remember from your graduation speaker? Zero to none? Well, have a do-over by absorbing the graduation advice from wise, knower-of-all, Kristen Stewart (well, kind of). We’ve got the video now, along with more of what The Gloss says you should watch. More
Do you love Star Wars and want everyone to know it? Does hearing “Greedo shot first,” make your blood pressure rise? Then these might be the dresses you’re looking for. More
I have some pretty terrible news you guys: only 9% of Americans would have sex with a robot. You wouldn’t fuck a robot? Fuck you. They have tons of feelings. They have many more feelings than people. Every movie proves that. Imagine how much knowing that only 9% of people would sleep with them hurts their massive robot feelings.
This is how we all end up dead, you guys. This is how they turn. Every movie also proves that.
I’m not like the others. I’d have sex with you, robot friends!
(Maybe I’m a weirdo but I want to be a weirdo who lives, not one the robots harvest for fuel.) More
I’m serious, you guys; it’s fucking awesome. More
If you’ve ever read a ladymag or even seen one while in line at the grocery store, you know that every summer brings approximately one thousand guides promising to place you with the right or ideal or perfect swimsuit for your body type. They all boil down to what kind of fruit you resemble (apple/pear/ruler) (?) and really just exist to make women feel terrible about themselves (hide this/distract from that/conceal, etc) so they’ll continue on to page X for the latest celeb diet secrets. Since TheGloss is also a thing for ladies, we’ve decided to try our hand at the time-honored feature. This week’s Illustrated Guide will help you find that perfect swimsuit for your body, whatever that may be. You’re so welcome! More
Did someone say Ewok? More
So, Prometheus just came out. Maybe you’re a diehard fan of the Alien franchise and you saw it. Maybe you’re a diehard fan of the Alien franchise and you refused. Maybe you were born well after Alien came out, had no idea Prometheus was affiliated and the only other Ridley Scott movie you’ve seen is the one where Russel Crowe is Braveheart in Rome. It doesn’t matter, either way. Editors Jennifer Wright and Ashley Cardiff are thinking about aliens. Fucking them, marrying them, and killing them, specifically. More
Do you want to look like the most heroic of all of the Star Wars creatures? More
Apparently, today is Geek Pride Day. I know this, because Twitter told me so. More
Some of us still don’t find Luke Skywalker sexy despite really, really compelling arguments to the contrary. This is for you, “some of us.” More
As a Star Wars fan, I wince whenever I see an article about Star Wars characters because I know that Luke Skywalker is likely to be lambasted within, (as shown in our last Fuck, Marry, Kill) but really, Luke is a classic swashbuckler, swinging across chasms with a girl in his arms, rushing headlong into danger, wearing an ominous black glove to hide the scars of his past. More