Okay, allow us to come clean: we think sneaker wedges are horrible. Absolutely dreadful. We first saw them at NYFW a few years ago and thought, “Those won’t last more than a season.” Aaaaaaaaand, we were super fucking wrong. But we still hate them.
However, the recent release of Daddy’$ Money–Sketcher’s take on sneaker wedges that sets women back more than a few decades–moved us to compile a shopping guide of alternatives. This way, no one has to support unbelievably sexist marketing/bad taste in the name of owning sporty horse hooves.
In a surprising twist, we found some of them kind of cute. More
While I could deal with some of the more mild forms of unicornism, my brain is seriously not okay with the existence of these unicorn shoes. More
You may be looking at this picture of Carmen Electra in In Touch and thinking “no one wears stilettos on the beach.” Your thought process is wrong. I’ve done it. Here is why I have done that absurd thing. More
They somehow manage to look like a pair of those duct tape shoes that high schoolers make to win contests for prom. More
It’s just like a grandfather to be confused by all those pesky young kids! More
Earlier today, while scanning my reader for amusing stories to pick up, I came across one in The Huffington Post titled “The 7 Grossest Things Seen Backstage At Fashion Week.” There’s nothing I love more than gawking at the ugly side of fashion, so I clicked. Most of the things on the list were legitimately gross—stylists using their own spit on models in lieu of hair spray, people shaking other people’s hands right after they sneeze—but one item on the list stood out to me as potentially wrongheaded. More
Who are these people who drop so much money on things that they can only stare at alone in their room without sharing them with the world? Where do they live? What do they eat? More
Finally! Someone else agrees that flip-flops aren’t all the rage! More
Seriously; some part of you is going to be a mess after this, even if you’re not sure what part of you that is. More
What fresh hell is this? More
Oh, God. Okay, these are the shoes I wear pretty much every day: More
That hallucinatory summer heat is here and it’s causing you to make some pretty strange life choices, both in fashion and romance. Let’s analyze what your summer shoes say about your summer love interests, because every good pseudo-fashion therapist knows that shoes are the window to the sex life! More
I’ve never been shy about my love for knockoff Uggs, and by association, regular Uggs. More
So, two things: 1) Disney is rereleasing Cinderella on Blu-ray and DVD this fall (the vault is a harsh mistress) and 2) they’ve teamed up with Christian Louboutin to create some real glass slippers. The designer will “put his own ‘magic touch’ on the shoes,” which we take to mean “a red sole.” More